Why does my child only act up for me? - Kiindred

Why does my child only act up for me?

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First things first, this is actually a good thing! No really, stick with us. It’s actually very normal for babies to be little angels for everyone else and then scream, cry, winge, refuse to nap or eat and just generally act up for mama (or whoever is their primary caregiver).

You think surely you spend the most time with them so you should get the best of them, right? You are the closest to them so they should want to behave for you, right? Wrong. 

Sure, spending so much time with them you’re more privy to their sweet moments but being their primary caregiver makes you their safe space so it also means you get the highest highs and the lowest lows. You are the one who they feel they can be the most themselves with. You are the one they can let their guard down with and express themselves without fear. 

It’s a tough job being that person, we know, but it’s also kind of beautiful when you think about it like that. It actually means you are doing a great job and that they love you so much.

So then knowing this it can help you to manage these moments better – knowing that they are obviously feeling something deeply and they are feeling safe enough to express it with you can help you not to react with anger or frustration but instead with calm, reassurance and love. 

Knowing you will be there for them while they are having big feelings is vital for their emotional development and hopefully means they will also come to you with big feelings as they grow into big kids and eventually teens and adults.

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