Grandmothers: the quiet MVP of the family

Grandmothers hold a special kind of magic. They’re the best storytellers, the best at big warm hugs, the holders of family folklore and history, and for many of us, the anchor that keeps us all grounded.

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In different cultures and throughout history, grandmothers have played an important role in raising children, supporting families, and passing down their knowledge.

But grandmas aren’t just cuddles and baked treats (although those are pretty special). Their importance runs even deeper than we might realise. 

Science suggests that grandmothers may have played a key role in human evolution itself. The Grandmother Hypothesis proposes that the presence of grandmothers helped ensure the survival of their grandchildren, allowing our species to thrive in ways no other animal has.

It turns out that human existence can be attributed to your Granny, Nan, Abuela or Oma!

The science of grandmothers: Why humans are different

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Most animals continue punching out babies until the end of their lives, but humans are one of the rare exceptions. 

Alongside a few species like killer whales, human women experience menopause and live for decades beyond their baby-making years.

At first glance, this might seem weird – why would evolution favour women who stop having children? 

Anthropologists think the answer lies in the unique role grandmas play in families. Instead of continuing to have children of their own, older women were able to focus on helping raise their grandchildren. This support meant that younger mothers could have more children without being overwhelmed, leading to stronger, more stable family groups.

The Grandmother Hypothesis, first proposed by anthropologist Kristen Hawkes, suggests that this shift wasn’t just beneficial – it was essential. 

Grandmothers helped secure the survival of their grandchildren by providing food, care, and knowledge, strengthening family units and allowing early human communities to thrive.

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The many ways grandmothers shape our lives

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Even today, grandmothers continue to be a source of love, wisdom, and support in families. In some cultures, it’s still a tradition to live in multi-generational households for this reason. 

Their impact can be seen in a million different ways, both big and small. From stitching up a hem and picking up the kids after school, to being a shoulder to cry on when life gets overwhelming.

The original caregivers

Back in the day, before childcare centres and after-school programs became the norm, grandmothers were the go-to childcare experts. For many, they still are. Research has shown that children with involved grandmothers tend to be healthier, happier, and even more resilient.

For me, becoming a mum for the first time was super overwhelming. I was exhausted, sore, leaking milk and second-guessing everything. My mum and mother-in-law were there for backup without hesitation, with home-cooked meals, laundry folding, and baby cuddles when I needed a nap. 

Grandmas have been the reliable backbone of families for generations. 

Keepers of family traditions and stories

Grandmothers are also the bridges between generations – the ones who pass down stories, traditions, and values that shape who we are.

My Grandma’s stories of her own youth and experience are burned into my brain. She spoke of a world very different from mine where you made all your clothes by hand and saved your ‘Sunday best’. 

She was from a generation that lived their lives both pre- and post-invention of the contraceptive pill, which gave reproductive freedom for the first time. She lived through the Depression and the Second World War and imparted perspectives and wisdom that are so important for future generations to remember. 

She also shared delicious family recipes (hello chocolate cake with coffee icing), gave brilliant hugs, and was always there with a pot of Lapsang Tea and a crossword. 

In Indigenous cultures worldwide, grandmothers are particularly revered as knowledge keepers, responsible for passing down language, history, and spirituality. 

A source of unconditional love

There’s something uniquely comforting about a grandmother’s love. Whether it’s a warm hug, a soft-spoken reassurance, or a secret stash of biccies just for you, grandmothers make the world feel safer.

Research has even shown that children who have close relationships with their grandparents tend to have lower levels of stress and anxiety. Perhaps it’s because grandmothers have a way of seeing the bigger picture – of reminding us that hard times pass, that we are stronger than we think, and that, at the end of the day, love is what matters most.

Shaping future generations

Grandmothers do more than just offer love and support – they shape who we become.

As a mother, I see my own mum in a new light. I think back to all the things she did for me – the sacrifices, the patience, the endless support – and I have a newfound appreciation for the strength and love it takes to raise a child. 

Now, watching her with my children, it’s clear that a mother’s work is never done. It just evolves.

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A heartfelt thank you to grandmothers everywhere

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To all the grandmothers – whether you’re a Grandma, Abu, Nan, Nonna, Oma, Yaya, or any other much-loved name – thank you.

Thank you for the bedtime stories, the encouragement, and the endless supply of love. Thank you for being the calm in the chaos, the voice of reason in difficult times, and the warm hugs we’ll never outgrow.

Your love is a gift, and according to the Grandmother Hypothesis, humankind owes you endless gratitude.