Tips for raising twin toddlers to make it twice as nice

Javeria Adenwalla
Javeria Adenwalla
Javeria is a writer, a yogi and an absolute lover of life. She reports live from the trenches of motherhood, stepping on metaphoric landmines, and sharing her experiences with unwavering optimism as she raises her three musketeers. Whenever life throws her off balance, she swivels back to zen mode with the power of yoga. When she’s not busy mastering the art of parenting,...
Updated on Jan 19, 2024 · 5 mins read

Welcome to the wild and wonderful world of raising twins where it’s double the trouble and double the fun!  If you’re a parent of multiples, you already know that life with these pint-sized dynamos can be a rollercoaster ride like no other. From synchronised crying sessions to tag-team tantrums, it’s a 24/7 gig that requires a sense of humour, an endless supply of coffee, and above all, the arms of an octopus.

I won’t delude you by painting a pretty picture here, but fear not – I will share some tried-and-true tips that will help you navigate the magical mayhem of raising twins from the early years to preschool. From disciplining these tiny tornadoes to surviving those epic twin tantrums that could rival a Hollywood blockbuster, we’ve got you covered.

Now, let’s address the burning questions that keep us up at night, pondering the mysteries of twin parenting. How do you discipline not one, but two energetic 4-year-olds who seem to have an uncanny ability to test the limits of your sanity? Is it normal for these tiny humans to engage in WWE-style wrestling matches over a stuffed unicorn or who gets to wear the superhero cape? And most importantly, how do you deal with those twin toddler tantrums that make you question whether you’ve accidentally stumbled into a parallel universe?


So grab your coffee and get ready for some parenting wisdom that’s served with a side of laughter, a pinch of wit, and a generous sprinkling of “How on earth did I end up with two of them?!”

Tip to nurture twins

Raising 4-year-old twins is an exhilarating journey filled with unique challenges and extraordinary moments. Here are some essential tips to ensure a harmonious and fulfilling upbringing for your dynamic duo.

Embrace individuality: 

Even though your twins may share the same birthday and DNA, they are unique individuals with their own personalities and preferences. Encourage their individuality by providing them with separate experiences and opportunities to explore their own interests. This will help them develop a strong sense of self and reduce any potential rivalry or competition.

Set clear boundaries: 

Discipline is an essential part of parenting, especially when it comes to 4-year-old twins. I know it’s tough to resist slipping up looking into those sweet little puppy eyes but keep your sight on the bigger picture. Clench that heart, trust me it is worth it for their long-term growth and development. Establish consistent rules and boundaries, and make sure both children understand them. Be firm and fair. Remember to reinforce positive behaviour with praise and rewards. Above all stay consistent.

Address twin tantrums: 

Tantrums are a normal part of toddlerhood, and twins are no exception. When faced with tantrums, it’s crucial to stay calm and composed. Separate the twins if necessary to avoid escalating the situation. Provide them with a quiet space to cool down and express their feelings. Once they have calmed down, offer comfort and help them find alternative ways to express their emotions.

Encourage problem-solving: 

Twins often learn from one another and develop problem-solving skills through their interactions. I know it’s often a reflex, but resist the urge to intervene immediately. Encourage them to resolve conflicts and disagreements on their own whenever possible. This fosters independence and teaches valuable skills in negotiation and compromise.

Nurture individual bonding: 

While it’s important to foster a strong bond between your twins, it’s equally vital to allow for individual bonding time. Spend one-on-one time with each child, engaging in activities they enjoy. This will strengthen your connection with each twin and make them feel special and valued as individuals.

Be mindful of behavioural issues: 

Do twins have more behavioural problems? Well, research suggests that twins may have a slightly higher incidence of behaviour-related issues compared to singletons. Keep a close eye on their behaviour and seek professional advice if you notice any persistent issues. Early intervention and support can make a significant difference in helping your twins thrive.

Stay positive and flexible: 

Remember that parenting is a journey filled with ups and downs. Stay positive and flexible in your approach to raising twins. There will be challenging days, but also moments of joy and triumph. Celebrate the small victories and learn from the setbacks.

Establish a routine:

Like most kids, twins thrive on routine and predictability. Establish a consistent daily schedule that includes meal times, nap times, playtime, and bedtime. A structured routine can help your twins feel secure and create a sense of stability.

Practice patience:

Raising twins can sometimes be demanding and chaotic. Practice patience and remind yourself that it’s normal for things to get hectic. Take deep breaths, find moments of calm, and approach challenging situations with a patient mindset.

Seek support: 

Parenting twins can sometimes feel overwhelming, and it’s okay to ask for help. Reach out to fellow parents of twins, and join support groups. Or if you feel like indulging in aided guidance you can even enrol in parenting courses specifically tailored to raising multiples. Sharing experiences and advice with others who understand the unique challenges of raising twins can provide immense support and reassurance. You will be surprised how many similarities you have with fellow parents.

Remember, every set of twins is unique, and what works for one family may not work for another. Trust your instincts, learn from your experiences, and adapt your parenting approach to suit the needs of your twins. Above all, enjoy the incredible adventure of raising twins and embrace the love and joy they bring into your life.

So, hold on tight. It will be a wild and wonderful journey, filled with double the giggles, doubles the milestones, the love and those precious moments that make it all worthwhile.

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